October 10, 2014

Authenticity....

I've decided it would be fun to participate in a "Blog Hop"... Thank you Lisa Betz (my friend over at www.lisabetz.com) This particular Blog Hop is 26 days from A....Z. Since I try to focus on all things relationship over here on thekingsmountain, I choose AUTHENTICITY as my first post. Here goes...

Authenticity: it seems my English teacher would not be thrilled with dictionary.com's definition at all...
noun
1.
the quality of being authenticgenuineness.
...well ok, maybe that second part. So let's try this instead, 
Authentic: (this one may be the better choice as per my English teacher's definition of a definition)
adjective
1.
not false or copied; genuine; real: an authentic antique.
2.
having the origin supported by unquestionable evidence; authenticated; verified: an authentic document of the Middle Ages; an authentic work of the old master. (I would add...the Bible is the authentic Word of God...yes, it has been verified)
3.
entitled to acceptance or belief because of agreement with known facts or experience; reliable; trustworthy: an authentic report on poverty in Africa.
4.
Law. executed with all due formalities: an authentic deed.
5.
Music.
  1. (of a church mode) having a range extending from the final to the octave above.
    Compare plagal.
  2. (of a cadence) consisting of a dominant harmony followed by a tonic.
6.
Obsolete, authoritative.

I think most of us if we were to open up a Reader's Digest (are they still in print today?) to the Word Power page (I LOVED this page!) when seeing the word "authentic" hope that definition #1 or #2 are in the options (#6....seriously would be my last guess....EVER! Ok, well, maybe not now). But I digress....

We want to talk about relationships & more specifically how today's word relates. 
Relationships....with God, my family & my friends. I want those relationships to be genuine & real. And if we are fortunate enough to have some true friendships, some authentic friendships, they will be 'verified' & 'reliable', often accepted because of known or what I'd call shared beliefs & experiences. (See definition #3)

What does authenticity in relationships look like? 
I would say it means a safe place where I can share the real me, the hurts, the pains, the joys, the delights, tears & laughter, deep wounds & scars from where I've healed all the while knowing that other person will still love & accept me. 

What keeps us from the authenticity in those places? 
For me...it's fear. Fear of being hurt again. Fear of being forgotten or left behind. Fear of being judged. I believe that for each one of us, our current & future authentic relationships can be defined in part by how our past relationships have "worked out." That makes me sad...because for me...I have been hurt, I have been forgotten, I have been left behind or worse-left out & I have been judged. What makes me even sadder though...is that when I take an authentic look inside myself, really deeply inside with the help of God's Holy Spirit, I realize that I have done this to others as well. I have hurt them. I have forgotten them or left them behind, or worse yet left them out. I have judged them. It may not have been intentional (rarely do any of us go around thinking, "hmmmm...how can I hurt this person the most today."), but I know I have still done these things. 

How am I going to be authentic when THAT happens? When I am the offendER? Authenticity says I will go to that person & bring to them the sorrow I feel over the hurt I brought to them. I will seek their forgiveness & attempt to the best of my ability to regain trust. 

What about if I am the offendED? I must be honest with the hurt, not bury it or put a smile on pretending all is well with that relationship. I need to offer forgiveness & an opportunity for the other party to regain trust in our relationship. That being said, I need to also know if this relationship is truly an authentic one. Today, in our world of social interactions, we have redefined the word 'friend' to be a number...of followers, of likes, of 140 characters. That is not authenticity. That is superficial (hmmmm an 's' word...oh shoot, I'm getting ahead of myself!) 

I think I shall end with this....what does authenticity look like in your world?



8 comments:

Lisa Betz said...

Great choice for the letter A. Authenticity is easier said than done, but worth the effort.

Joanne Sher said...

Being yourself can be TOUGH - no matter how counterintuitive that might sound (LOL). People need to know the real us. Great post!

Karla Akins said...

I'm a huge fan of authenticity. I never was a game player. Was never good at being anything but transparent. And I gravitate toward authentic people. I never did get the "girl games" people played in high school and I certainly don't get those games with adults today! Just be real, please! Great post!

Patty Wysong said...

Authenticity is such a big one!! It's not something we find in today's world and that's sad.

I'm glad you're joining us for A to Z!! (sorry I'm late, still playing catch up)

shelly k said...

Thank you all so much. It is exciting to have so many (yes 4 is many!) drop by my blog & read what I write :) I am excited to be part of the A to Z hop and am looking forward to tomorrow's "B" day. Been thinking on it...as you can see I don't write often enough. Part of the reason is the cumbersome log-in through Blogger & Google and such....anyone have a suggestion on a better FREE easy to use site that I can import what I already have & not lose my address? I'm a bit new (as you can see) to all of this blogging consistently.

Oh....and I too have some catching up to do on everyone else's blogs!

Patty Wysong said...

Shelley, I never log out of Blogger and therefore never have to log back in. I have a short cut on my browser that brings me straight to my Dashboard, just like I do with FB. Otherwise I'd go crazy logging in and out all the time. I'll often keep a tab open with Blogger on it--that way I'm more likely to put up a post, and it serves to remind me in weeks when I'm busy.

Just what works for me. =]

shelly k said...

Patty-I TRY to not log out! HA...technology just doesn't always play nice.

I think where I am having my issue is with the Blogger app on my iPhone. Because of course when I do have a great thought process, I seem to be out and about! Any experience there?

I really appreciate the help & the feedback!

Patty Wysong said...

Oh, on your phone!
LOL. I quit trying that--could never get the right password. *oops* It sure would be great if I could though!